Start relationship with a Mentee

Thanks so much for taking on a new mentee. We’re really grateful for your willingness to support a leader in this way. Below is a quick reminder of some of the key things to cover in your early meetings.

Get to know one another

The purpose of the first meeting is exploratory: ‘do we think we could get on well in a mentoring relationship?’ It often helps to begin by telling a little of your stories, getting to know one another, and then exploring what the mentee is looking for in a mentoring relationship. You may then like to reflect on the first meeting before you come to a decision about whether to take on the mentee (and they take on you!). Alternatively you may want to discuss the items below as part of the first meeting.

Clarify expectations

At the start it is important to establish clear expectations. When mentoring relationships don’t go well it can normally be traced back to unclear expectations., so here are a few things to talk through early on:
  • Purpose: why are you meeting? What has led the mentee to seek a mentor? What are they hoping to get out of the relationship?
  • Time frame: initially how many sessions are you committed to? Four, six, ten?
  • Frequency: how often are you going to meet? Once a month (probably the normal), every six weeks, two months?
  • Length of meeting: how long will you meet for? One hour, 90 minutes, two hours?
  • Location: where are you going to meet?
  • Preparation: how is the mentee going to prepare for the meeting? Often it helps if the mentee sends the mentor an email two days before the meeting identifying the things they would like to talk about this time.
  • Commitment: on what basis can a meeting be cancelled?
  • Prayer: what part does prayer play in this mentoring relationship?
  • Affirmation and challenge: what level of affirmation and challenge is the mentee looking for?
  • Accountability: in what ways are you going to hold the mentee accountable for any developmental steps they identify they want to take?
  • Communication between meetings: what level of communication will there be between meetings? None, an occasional email to update you, phone calls?
  • Expenses: there is no charge for mentoring through Mentor Connect, however, it is expected that all expenses are paid for by the mentee i.e. if you meet in a coffee shop they get the coffees, or if you have to travel to the meeting the mentee covers your travel costs.
  • Confidentiality: what does this look like? On what grounds will you as the the mentor break confidentiality and how will you do that?
  • Evaluation: how are you both going to evaluate how things are going? Briefly at the end of each session, every three or four sessions, after six sessions?

If at any point you have any questions about things do contact us.

We pray the time with your mentee will be a rich resource for their development as a leader.

Stop Relationship with a Mentee

Your mentoring relationship has come to an end. We hope it has gone well and has been a good experience for both of you.

We take feedback seriously, and would be very grateful if you contact us to provide any invaluable information on how to improve the service we offer through Mentor Connect. We would really appreciate your contribution as it will inform developments of the site and our mentors.

At this point please also update your profile, including indicating whether you are free to offer mentoring to anyone else and ensuring your bio reflects any changes in your circumstances.